literature

Baby Got Math: A song parody

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Oh, my, gosh. Becky, look at her fractal.
It's so big. *scoff* She looks like,
one of those math guys' girlfriends.
But, y'know, who understands those math guys? *scoff*
They only talk to her, because,
she looks like a total fractalist, 'kay?
I mean, her fractal, it just so BIG. *scoff*
I can't believe it just so layered, it's like,
spiraled, I mean- gross. Look!
She's just so.... weird!

I like big fractals, and I cannot lie
You other brothers can't deny
That when a girl walks in with a parameter file
And a fractal in your face
You get stoked, wanna pull out your tough
'Cause you notice that piece was stuffed
Deep in those files she saving
I'm hooked and I can't stop staring
Oh, baby, I wanna get wit'cha
And render your picture
My homeboys try to warn me
But with that fractal you got makes me so nerdy
Ooh, Fractal o'smooth skin
You say you wanna get in my Benz?
Well, save me, save me
'Cause you ain't that average art-ee
I've seen them typin'
The heck with romancin'
She's sweat, wet,
Got it going like a turbo 'Vette
I'm tired of admins
Sayin' paintings are the thing
Take the average math geek and ask him that
She's gotta pack much math
So math geeks! (Yeah!) Math geeks (Yeah!)
Has your girlfriend got the file? (Heck yeah!)
Tell'em to save it. (Save it!) Save it (Save it!)
Save that fractal piece!
Baby got math.

(FE face with UF booty)
Baby got math!

I like'em round, and colored
And when I'm throwin' a gig
I just can't help myself, I'm acting like a animal
Now here's my scandal
I wanna get you home
And ugh render-up, ugh, ugh
I ain't talking bout Photoshop
'Cause vector shapes are made for toys
I want'em real thick and spiraled
So find that juicy spiral
Mix-A-Lot's in trouble
Beggin' for a piece of that fractal
So I'm looking at gallery floes
Knock-kneed anime' looking like dumbos
You can have them dumbos
I'll keep my women like fract-os
A word to the digital sistas, I wanna get with ya
I won't cuss or rip ya
But I gotta be straight when I say I want to fractal
Til the break of dawn
Baby got it goin' on
A lot of wimps won't like this song
'Cause them dorks like to rip and save it
And I'd rather stay and play
'Cause I'm long, and I'm strong
And I'm down to get the layers on
So, ladies! (Yeah!) Ladies (Yeah!)
If you wanna roll in my file
Then turn around! Save it lots!
Even chess boys gotta shout
Baby got math!

Baby got math!
Yeah baby, when it comes to females, shoe size ain't got nothin'
to do with my selection. 36-24-36? Ha, ha, only if she's using Apophysis.

So your girlfried rolls a PC, playin' CDs by Streisand
But Streisand ain't got a motor in the back of her PC
My computer don't want none
Unless you got params, hun
You can do Tierazon or FE,
But please don't look those params
Some admins wanna play that "hard" file
And tell you that file ain't gold
So they toss it and leave it
And I pull back to retrieve it
So admins say you aren't phat
Well I ain't down with that!
'Cause your laptop is small and your fractals are kickin'
And I'm thinkin' about stickin'
To the silly admins in dA Land:
You ain't it, you guys!
Give me a sista, I can't resist her
Some knucklehead tried to dis
'Cause his girls are on my list
He had game but he chose to rip'em
And I pull up quick to get wit'em
So ladies, if the fractal is cool,
Dial 1-800-FRACTALS-ROCK
And kick them nasty thoughts
Baby got math!

(Little in the middle but she got much math) 4x
I know. This is HORRIBLE and I should be smacked for this. This is a rework/parody of Sir Mix-a-lot's classic "Baby Got Back" for *laurengary's protest contest.

And this IS written from a male point-of-view. It's like if Mix-A-Lot was a calculus dude.

My apologies.
© 2007 - 2024 JennDixonPhotography
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